Oldies Music

I think the older songs sound better. No techno beats. No TERRIBLE voices. Lyrics that mean something & are coherent. I like them. The new musical samples out there are usually one track. Sex, violence, more sex, more violence. Gets monotonous after a while. While I know that there won't be a return to those days, I still wish they would. Just so I can play a cd without hearing voice overs or digitized enhancements. I like the natural stuff. By the way, I honestly don't know if there was any of that in the 60's or 70's but I coubt it. If you know for sure, let me know. Thanks. Later.

Twin of Twins

I met these 2 guys last week. Really liked their CD. SO FUNNY!!! I asked them aboutt he expletives in it. They said that it didn't sell without expletives. Actually didn't move off the shelf. Record stores were returning them. Once they put in the expletives, sales skyrocketed. It's one of the hottest selling cds in Jamaica today. Go figure. As one said, it shows the hypocrisy of society. It claims to want better morals but doesn't seem to want it when it comes down to it. So why do we say it? Let's just be honest. We don't want better. Close the churches! Open more massage parlours! Legalize Ganja! No more charities! Every man for himself! Is this where we want to go? Just throwing out a thought there. Thanks Twin of Twins. They wrote an autograph to me & my church but somehow I get the feeling that Rev. White wouldn't want it...
Later.

R.Kelly

I like R. Kelly's music. He's a great musician. Honestly, he's so much better than most of the musical charlatans out there. He just needs to deal with his perversions. As the great Twin f Twins said, he suffers from a chronic "eating disorder" and he needs to realize that human biological waste belongs in the toilet leading to the sewer and not on human skin or in human orifices. That's my main problem with him though. Otherwise, he is a musical genius. Hope he finds God soon. He loves to sing religious songs but if you not living the life, why sing about it? Just my opinion. All the bes tto him. May God extend salvation to him. Later.

How to be a great leader of Teenage Jamaican Christians

These are from my experience. I am sure the experts wil have some or all of these too. Feel free to add or discard some of these tips. List not exhaustive.

1. Know your kids & what's important in each of their lives.
2. Set a high standard for your group.
3. Be considerate & empathise.
4. Be consistent.
5. Emphasize the person above the rules.
6. Listen thoughtfully & objectively to what they say.
7. Give them objectives & vision.
8. Give orders as suggestions/requests.
9. Delegate authority as much as possible.
10. Show you have faith in each of them & you expect them to do their best.
11. Keep them informed about stuff.
12. Let them in your plans for them as early as feasible.
13. Ask them for input/help.
14. Respect their ideas.
15. Allow them a part in decision making that affects the group.
16. Tell the person who originates the idea the impact it has, what action was taken & why.
17. Allow them to carry out their ideas.
18. Build up their sense of belonging to the group.
19. Minimize unpleasant surprises.
20. Criticize constructively & in private.
21. Praise in public.
22. Give credit to deserving persons.
23. Accept complaining & grumbling as expected & sort of healthy in a group.
    

Stress Management Tips

1. Take a break from work.
2. Use your bath as a spa.
3. Exercise.
4. Sex (for married people only!).
5. Count to ten (or higher).
6. Shoppping.
7. Deep breathing.
8. Treat yourself/Reward yourself.
9. Think of pleasant things.
10. Take a short walk.
11. Socialize.
12. Wear comfortable clothing & shoes.
13. Get a hobby.
14. Try something new every 6 months.
15. Avoid negative people, memories, events & situations as much as posssible.
16. Change scenery.
17. Get a support group.
18. Have a confidant.
19. Emapathise.
20. Challenge yourself.
21. Upgrade your skills regularly.
22. HAVE GOD IN YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!
    

Why I think Men are happier (Ana Fernandez)

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such
simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all
yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just
another snack.

You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a
white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water
park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas
station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have
to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work,
more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux
rental-$100.


People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New
shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the
time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks. A 5-day vacation requires only one suitcase .
You can open all of your own jars. You get extra credit for the
slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you,
he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes
are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in
public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything
on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for
years, maybe even decades. You only have to shave your face and
neck.

You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides
your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes = one color for all
seasons. You can wear shorts no matter what how your legs look. You
can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in
25 minutes. No wonder men are happier.

Acknowledgement

I received the last 12 posts or so from www.jamaicans.com
I found the site entertaining & thought you guys would appreciate it too. Hope you did. god bless you. If you are not jamaican, then I hope it gives you insight as to how such a small country (4,411 sq. miles) & such a small population (less than 3 million) can make such a worldwide impact. Jamaicans are everywhere! seriously. God bless this island. Later.

I like this one (hope u see the STD parallel)

Many of you are not practicing safe behavior by listening to reggae music unprotected and are now either suffering from R.E.G.G.A.E. or contracted the virus that causes fully blown R.E.G.G.A.E.... Real Explicit songs Generating Gross Adult Expression which was discovered in the late 70's has skyrocketed in the 90's as more people come forward with the disease. The syndrome will continue to increase as entertainment artists and producers continue to release songs such as "Dawg like we" "Gal Dem Friend" and "crazy glue".

First let it be known that not all reggae music causes this disease. Specialist researching the syndrome for years have dissected the area of reggae music which causes this disease. It's called dancehall reggae and the virus is called "LEWD LYRICS".

The lewd lyrics virus works through the words used in these songs.The virus attacks the learning side of your brain emptying it of useful words such as "lovemaking" and replacing it with words such as"bed work".

There are no obvious physical symptoms, apart from some R.E.G.G.A.E. carriers dressing like their favorite lewd lyrics chanting artist. The mental symptoms however is quite obvious especially when they become verbalized into fully blown R.E.G.G.A.E. The lewd lyrics virus attacks your immune moral system and changes your mental outlook at things that are personal. As one R.E.G.G.A.E. sufferer explains, "I didn't think it could happen to me I thought I was invincible till I noticed these weird symptoms. If it could happen to me it can happen to anyone else, so be aware."
R.E.G.G.A.E. is very contagious and can be transmitted from person to person via:

• Musical transfer - This is the exchanging of reggae tapes between multiple partners.
• Unprotected Reggae music listening - This is knowingly listening to LYRIC carrying reggae music with out any protection.
  Intermittent listening - This is the injection of LYRIC carrying reggae music to your system.

Specialist have yet to find a cure but have issued guidelines on ways to protect yourself:

1. Abstinence from listening, even casual listening. If you cannot abstain then listen to conscious reggae like Black Uhuru, Bob Marley, Ziggy Marley, Beres Hammond, Dennis Brown, Christafari, and Maxi Priest. These types of music contain a virus call "CLEAN LYRIC" which can help to build an immune system against the "LEWD LYRIC" virus.
2. Wear earplugs. If you are forced into situations where you were not prepared for reggae music remember to wear your earplugs it could save your life. They are uncomfortable, but they are being improved to give the feeling you are wearing nothing. " PROTECT yourself. PREVENTION is better when there is NO CURE. R.E.G.G.A.E. will continue to spread".

Food for thought for people who love image mroe than substance

By D. George
Posted Friday, December 1, 1995

When you visit Jamaica it is important to give the impression that your life is great even though you work 70 hours a week at your first job and 22 hours a week on your second job (keep in mind there 168 hours in a week). To accomplish this feat one must stretch the truth a bit. Since most of your friends and relatives from Jamaica visit once every 5 years, if the visa permits, no one will ever know.

On arrival complain about the heat and how you are able to run your air condition unit all year round. If you drive a Toyota say that in the U.S. you drive a Lexus (same company, right). After saving for this trip you can afford to spend big. Buy everyone a roast corn and manish water on the way to Ocho Rios, buy cook food every day, rent an expensive car and most important always pay in U.S. currency. Remember the key is to showcase a lifestyle you don't have.

One may ask, why is it important to give this impression ? Jamaicans in Jamaica think the U.S.A. is the country where everyone is rich. Many aspire to come here and live the luxourious life they perceive everyone else has. It would be rude to burst the bubble of many Jamaicans who are going to move here and get the shock of their life. The impression you leave will be imprinted in thier minds. Imagine your relatives saying this when they get back to Jamaica "Bigga really mek it big ina Miami";"Junior sey im house bigger than Devon House";"Puncey say she jus buy a cris new Lexus”. The greatness about it all is they will brag about this and more, while you are here living the immigrants "American Dream". A paycheck away from being homeless or moving back home, to Jamaica.

For the old Jamaicans among us

Memba wen yu a come fram school and stop fi pick Mass John cherry off im cherry tree and dawg run yu dung.

Memba wen yu madda sen yu fi tek the clothes fram aff a di line but yu wait til night den yu fraid fi go by yuself.

Memba wen yu fraid fi go a shop by yuself a night because Miss Matty jus' dead and yu tink yu might si her duppy.

Memba wen yu and yu frien dem decide seh unu a go run a boat, the biggest cart wheel dumplin yu eva si.

Memba wen coming fram school ina di rain and yu tek off yu shoes and walk barefoot all the way home a race board horse
inna di gutter water.

Memba wen dem use fi gi weh free milk powder and bulga rice a school, an' yu play milk powder war all the way home.

Memba wen dem good rice and peas and chicken Sunday dinna with a nice refreshing glass a carrot juice.

Memba wen yu 'ave roast breadfruit and ackee and salt fish breakfast jus' barely a day afta yu Saturday Peas soup wid
cho-cho, turnip, carrot an'punkin.

Memba wen teacha beat yu because yu neva do yu homework.

Memba marning time wen yu reach a school jus in time fi devotion and yu betta mek sure yu ave yu hym book and yu bible, yu pleat dem betta in order and yu khaki well starch.

Memba dem good ole starch uniform ( coudda stan up by demself ) and yu nice shine brown or black shoes.

Memba when yu madda use fi seh "Go pick a switch mek a beat yu".

Memba Christmas time wen everybody a mek a suit fi gran market night, mama stay up a bake cake, draw sorrell, cook curry goat, don't figet the case a D&G soda and red stripe beer weh unda the bed.

Memba when a guinep seed fly dung yu throat and smaddy 'ave fi lick yu back fi mek it fly back up.

Memba when yu swallow chewing gum & dem seh yu ago ded cause it ago tie up yu tripe.

Memba a come fram school and stap fi get the last piece a Miss Brown toeto and a suck suck.

Memba dem seh nuh buy nuh sky juice fram Mr. Tom because im ave sore foot.

Memba when dem seh nuh buy bun & cheeze from juicie cause him use di knife cut & clean him toenail.

Memba saving part a lunch money fi buy ice cream fram creamy weh come pan Sunday.

Memba a fling stone fi lick dung ginep and the stone bus yu bredda head.

Memba the peanut man...the jackfruit lady...the orange man...the drumpan man (jerky)?

Memba a play marble wid yu bredren dem.

Memba a go a bush wid yu fadda.

Memba a go undaneat the cellar fi the fowl egg.

Memba a jump rope wid yu frien dem....One two Beeny...lick im mek im feel eh, mek im know yu mean eh, yu mean eh, yu mean eh.

Memba a kick foot ball wid yu frien dem roun' a ball grong.

Memba yu madda sen yu go a shop and yu sing the list all the way deh "one pint milk, one bread, 1 lb a flour. But wen yu reach deh, yu tell the shop keeper yu want "1 pint of bread ,1 pound of milk & a flour.

Memba when yu last yu madda money and yu fraid fi go back home because she might beat yu.

Memba settin up the cock dem fi fight.

Memba all dem good duppy story, and nancy story wi 'ear growing up.

IF YU MEMBA ANY OF THIS, YU OLD FI TRUE!!!

Funny But True: Croaking Lizards

By D.George (April 2002)
Posted Monday, April 1, 2002

"Ef a croaking lizaz jump pon any part a yuh skin it gwen leave a skin mark."

Want to bring a Jamaican to their knees. Just mention the word croaking lizards. The lizard, which of the gecko family is one of most feared things in Jamaica and clear a room quicker than a 3-alarm fire.

"Aaakk, Aaaakk, aaak"

This lizard makes the most annoying sound at night & that has scared the "bedevil" out of Jamaicans and have created ore myths that you can count with fingers and toes. Shining a light won't scare them because they are bold as a "bad dog".

The croaking lizard has broken up more marriages than any mistress can. You see any good Jamaican woman will refuse to sleep in a house with a croaking lizard in it. Jamaican women feel it is a husband’s duty to kill the lizard. Not only beat the daylight out of the lizard but he must also show it to her as proof that it is dead and that he has an undying love for her.

Most true Jamaican man will refuse such a request. If a croaking lizard jump on a man or bites him it will truly affect his manhood (nature and sexual prowess) hence they would rather seek a separation or leave their wife. No one wants to supper such a faith.

I have had my own experiences with this croaking lizards and I think I have come out on the top. As a teenager I had to wake up real early to go to school. Now there was a croaking lizard in the kitchen and I had to eat breakfast. Nothing stands between my breakfast and me. My routine in the morning before the croaking lizard took residence up in the kitchen was: wake up, take a shower, brush my teeth, put on my school uniform and then eat breakfast.

When the croaking lizard came on the scene and started to make the annoying but scary "acccking sound" I knew I had to change my routine to accommodate him. I had my life to live and no croaking lizard was going to stop this. My new routine became: wake up, walk to the kitchen, turn the light on (this did not deter him from continuing to make his "acccking sound"), throw my schools shoes in the direction I heard the sound and wait for him to stop then continue with my regular routine. This routine worked perfectly for about a year until a second croaking lizard showed up...

Soon stop

Remember This in Jamaica


By Author Unknown
Posted Saturday, June 1, 2002

At primary school:

* an icy mint was 1 cent
* a fudge was 5 cents
* free vegetable patties
* free cows milk, cherry milk
* free uniform material

Walking through the Malls in Constant Spring at Christmas, lighting sparkles.
The song "Arlene a musi dream yu deh dream"
Far less crime and poverty
Ring Ding when it was in black and white, or Colgate Cavity Fighters club.
Sunday Matinee in black and white.
Running between the roller-coaster, tilt-a-whirl, scrambler and bumper cars at Coconut park.
J.O.S. buses.
Paper fifty cents.
Hello, my name is Tamara Dobson.. even though you may know me as Cleopatra Jones."
The radio soap opera "Dulcemina". CeeBert.
Toppsi and Epiphany night clubs.
A.P.I. TV programming, shortly followed by JAMAL- Into the Light.
When splinter was called grass bottle and mirror was looking glass.
When travelling after SIX the only thing to be afraid of was DUPPY.
When people went to parties to dance with each other and not to cut pose.
When school children looked like scholars.
The Fortunes of Floralee" radio soap opera.
Please ah beggin u sumting for my two children dem mam" ....JUDY!!? ... JUDY SMITH, the maths brains from Primary school who used to help me?!"
Schools Challenge Quiz with Dennis Hall, or Dennis Hall for that matter.
Fun-For-All video game house.
Ina Pine's weather forecasts: Kingston, 85 degrees and sunny; Montego Bay, 85 degrees and sunny, Negril 85 degrees; Port Antonio, 85 degrees and sunny; Spanish Town, 85 degrees and sunny; Mandeville, 70 degrees and partly cloudy".
Skateland.
The New Market floods.
Shouting repeatedly at the tuck-shop: "One patty an' coco-bread an' a box juice an' a drops!", until you were acknowledged.
Buying paradise plum, icy mint, sky juice, suck-suck or busta through the fence.
Black Heart man stories.
Anansi and Bredda Rabbit stories.
The Back Tax Axe TV commercials.
Lawd, Ah confused"...."Ello, Carltons.."
Shelly-Ann Jeans: No one can, like Shelly-Ann.
When "Roaches" were the shoe fashion; and "Napoleon" was the hair-style of choice for guys (who could grow enough hair);
Big League Football" on Sunday afternoons.
Peter Red and Peter Blue
The revolving Craven 'A' box at Tom Redcam
Avenue and Old Hope Road
The Kentucky 'turtle' building in Cross Roads
Getting up Harry? Yes ma,....... Laaad a feel peckish!!!
when "T" shirt was called ganzee and soda "airated wata"
Maskita one, maskita two, maskita jump inna hot callaloo
In the middle of a fight " HOT PATTY ,HOT PATTY box it nuh if yu brave"
I'm a Horlicks kid, soon I'll be Horlicks big..."
Pass the dutchie pan di lef' han' side...
King Kong kisko pops and cherry milk
"Spider man, spider man, does whatever a spider can"
"Love is all I bring, inna mi khaki suit an ting"- Uptown Top

And another...

Strange Jamaican fears

By D.George (November 2002)
Posted Saturday, November 16, 2002

Duppies(Jamaican name for Ghosts)
Educated & non-educated Jamaicans alike go to great lengths to protect their surroundings from duppies. I just never understood why some people sprinkle the blood of a white chicken in the corners of the new room to protect their home from "duppies". Some are even strong armed into doing this as they fear relatives and/friend will not visit there homes. There are stories of duppies causing people to get palsy, disfigurement, and suffocating. Duppy boxing (for you know in Jamaica box means a slap in the face) people is a regular thing and often used as an excuse for calling in sick to work or explaining marks on one’s face.

Rain
To normal people all over the world rain represents water from the sky. It represents life. But for my people it is like acid falling from the sky. Observe a Jamaican during a rainstorm or sprinkle and you will truly see where Jamaica got the name "the sprint factory”. I have seen people hurdle over cars and running faster than light to get to a dry area. If you are holding and event pray it does not rain because "my people" will not show up even if the event is indoors. "A who yuh tink yuh is, de Queen"?

Yes, my people will look at you like you’re crazy if you expect them to leave their house and chance getting even one drop of rain on them to attend your function.

The most ironic thing about the fear of the rain is "my people's" fascination with bathing. Mi neva noh a people who luv bathe suh. No wonder there is a water shortage on an island that is surrounded by water and has sufficient rainfall almost every year. “Wi jus luv bathe". We bathe at least 2 times a day if you are an adult and 3 times if you are a child. Some places in Europe are known to not rent their apartments to "my people" because we cost them too much in utilities. Rumor has it England has even deported some of "my people" after putting water restrictions in Brixton. Florida, which has a drought 2 years ago, can probably attribute this to having the 2nd highest Jamaican population outside of Jamaica. Our Jamaican motto is "cleanliness is Godliness" and we live it daily even if it is a river bath.

Dogs
You come up on a sign at the front of a yard. “BEWARD OF VERY BAD DOG”. You go in the yard and all you see is a scrawny mongrel barking at the top of its lungs. Be scared...Be very scared...If you are my people. Okay I know this will sound like a stereotype but every Jamaican I know fears dogs that are not their own.

"Miss B jus hole yuh bad dawg, mi nah go chobble yuh"

A little dog minding his own business can stop a hardened Jamaican criminal in his tracks. Yes my people fear dogs like a mouse fears a cat. Funny thing is that there are dogs everywhere in Jamaica.

Still another (www.jamaicans.com)

You Know You Are Old


By Melon T
Posted Monday, March 29, 2004

As a Jamaican you know you are getting older
if:

1. You had an exercise book with Queen Elizabeth and her husband on it, instead of a ring binder.
2. You used to listen to Rediffussion.
3. You wore Bata crepe to school and bought Asham at the gate. Give yourself an extra point, if you know what Asham was made of.
4. You remember that the Lou and Ranny show used to come on at 7:00 PM on a Sunday ("Whey me flat boad ")
5. You know what the initials T. A. D. P. stand for.
6. You know who Tony Verity was.
7. You can name more than two of the characters in a Jonkanoo band.
8. You know what boxing title Bunny Grant held.
9. You didn't buy gigs, yo yo's, kites or slingshots in a store. You made them yourself.
10. You know what Fanta and Nu Grape are.
11. You know what a Woolsley, Humber and Zephyr are.
12. You got a washout and worm medicine at the end of summer holidays.
13. Your school graduation was called "prize-giving"
14. You still call Norman Manley airport "Palisadoes"
15. You still have a BOAC bag hidden somewhere in a closet.
16. You remember when people used to go to the airport, and come back with a twang.
17. You still go to the airport just to stand on the waving gallery.
18. When you hear classical music on the radio you still ask: "Is who ded now"
19. You still refer to any smooth stretch of road as "barber greene"
20. You still use words like "bine" and "clyde" and know the difference between both.

ANSWER KEY: If you answer yes to less than 5 you are a babe
in the woods. 5 to 10 answers, you are listening to too many
of your parent's stories. 11 to 15: Getting up there, watch it!
16 to 19: You are very gray (Although you may be colouring/dyeing)
All 20 or 21: You have Limacol and Bay Rum on the nightstand,
and a chimmey under the bed

Another one (www.jamaicans.com)

You know you are flying Air Jamaica when...


By L. Hind
Posted Sunday, August 29, 2004

You know you are flying Air Jamaica when:

You get to the airport before the ticket counter staff...

Everybody is checking in suitcases the size of a refrigerator....

The person beside you taps you on your shoulder and says .." beg yu check een dis ya piece

ah luggage fah mi nuh... DO!"

Everybody makes a bolt for the gate when the announcer on the p.a.systems says that "..

this is NOT a boarding annoncement."

You can't get on board because somebody in front of you is trying to get a Toyota engine

block into the overhead compartment..

At least one passenger is accompanied by an armed Federal Agent....

Travellers on the plane call the flight attendant "Air Hostess"...

You can only get the Observer to read...

Everybody is trying to figure out what "Port of Embarkation" means...

Somebody hands a flight attendant a paper bag and asks her to "heat up dis ya patty fi mi

nuh baby"

When the plane starts to decend, a woman in the seat behind you says to her friend...

"Come Darris, time fi go tile-it an' tidy!"

The overhead compartment smells like fish and rum.... then it starts to drip on you...

Most of the passengers clap and clap when de pile-at lan de plane genkle..

Every body who have a big screen TV, a boom-box and a microwave go straight to the

"Nothing to Declare" line

Another one (www.jamaicans.com)

You know you are flying Air Jamaica when...

By L. Hind
Posted Sunday, August 29, 2004

You know you are flying Air Jamaica when:

You get to the airport before the ticket counter staff...

Everybody is checking in suitcases the size of a refrigerator....

The person beside you taps you on your shoulder and says .." beg yu check een dis ya piece ah luggage fah mi nuh... DO!"

Everybody makes a bolt for the gate when the announcer on the p.a.systems says that ".. this is NOT a boarding annoncement."

You can't get on board because somebody in front of you is trying to get a Toyota engine block into the overhead compartment..

At least one passenger is accompanied by an armed Federal Agent....

Travellers on the plane call the flight attendant "Air Hostess"...

You can only get the Observer to read...

Everybody is trying to figure out what "Port of Embarkation" means...

Somebody hands a flight attendant a paper bag and asks her to "heat up dis ya patty fi mi nuh baby"

When the plane starts to decend, a woman in the seat behind you says to her friend... "Come Darris, time fi go tile-it an' tidy!"

The overhead compartment smells like fish and rum.... then it starts to drip on you...

Most of the passengers clap and clap when de pile-at lan de plane genkle..

Every body who have a big screen TV, a boom-box and a microwave go straight to the "Nothing to Declare" line

People know you are Jamaican if ..........

1. You can distinguish between "cocoa-tea" "bush-tea" and"green-tea".
2. When someone sympathizes with you, you comment "Yuh tink seh it easy?"
3. You point with your lips.
4. You can't say "three" or "thing" ... you say "tree" and "ting".
5. You say words like Heg (instead of Egg); Hingland (instead of England).
6. You give directions with your hands, even if it is in another state.
7. You go to parties for the food and drink and then cuss afterwards when the food and drink run out.
8. You nod your head upwards to greet someone.
9. You always find yourself standing next to plenty of luggage and boxes at the airport.
10. When you travel home, you bring an extra suitcase going down, it has none of your clothes; returning, it has food.
11. You also point to other people picking their nose.
12. You hate to throw away empty containers as they might come in handy for pepper sauce or "green seasonings".
13. You have one big pot you call curry pot when you are not even cooking curry.
14. You have another pot you called dutch pot.
15. You say "boy" at the beginning of a sentence and "man" at the end of it.
16. You always hang something on your rearview mirror.
17. You put pepper sauce on everything for the taste.
18. You think eating ackee and saltfish, plaintain and fried dumplings is a great morning breakfast.
19. You can't go a week without a rice dish.
20. You think steak is a waste of good meat; you would rather cut it up and stew it with potatoes.
21. You chew and suck out all the marrow from the chicken bone and then pick out your teeth afterwards.
22. You save all juices from the cooked meats/chicken to use for flavour for your next dish.
23. You wash and rinse plastic utensils and cups that can be used again.
24. You bring home food from a party (enough for your breakfast the next morning, your lunch and your dinner!)
25. You chew the ice when you finish your drinks.
26. You must put dumplings in all soups.
27. You show disapproval by sucking your teeth.
28. You have a dishwasher in the house and only use it for special occasions.
29. At Christmas, you have to have "black cake".
30. You have a thyme (or mint) bush growing somewhere in your yard.

The Death clock

saw this website in my travels.

www.deathclock.com

check it out. claims to tell you your personal day of death.

funny how science claims to be more Godly than God.

Rebellion (from the Scripturist)

There is a sin that is not often discussed, but it is at the root of so many other sins. That sin is rebellion. I loved the movie REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE staring James Dean. It traces the story of three teen characters and shows that the reason they rebelled was the poor parenting in the home. There are reasons we rebel against God and against those God places over us or sends to rebuke us.

We can see the reasons by studying and learning from people in the Bible who rebelled. Hebrews 3:15 says, “As has just been said: ‘Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion.’ Who were they who heard and rebelled? Were they not all those Moses led out of Egypt?” The most famous bunch of rebels were the Israelites as they followed Moses out of Egypt. 1 Corinthians 10:10-11 says of them, “And do not grumble, as some of them did— and were killed by the destroying angel. These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come.” Their physical reality is an analogy of our spiritual reality. Their story was written as a warning and example of what not to do.

Why did they rebel? One reason is prejudice. Aaron was Moses’ older brother and chosen by God to be high priest over Israel. Miriam was Moses’ older sister, who helped save him as a baby and who led all the Israelite women in a glorious victory dance after the Egyptians were totally drowned in the sea. They were people who God had inspired and who had done great things for God. But even godly people can rebel against Him when they give in to prejudice.

Numbers 12:1-3 says, “Miriam and Aaron began to talk against Moses because of his Cushite wife, for he had married a Cushite. ‘Has the LORD spoken only through Moses?’ they asked. ‘Hasn’t he also spoken through us?’ And the LORD heard this. (Now Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth.)”

Moses was humble. They had no reason to rebel against him. The land of Cush, from which Cushites came, was Ethiopia. Ancient historians also record that Moses had at one point married a black woman from Ethiopia. Miriam and Aaron didn't say that was why they were talking against him, but the Bible tells us that was the real reason. They were prejudice against Moses’ black wife. Lesson: Never condemn someone's interracial marriage.

Prejudice is an ungodly thing. Why? Because God shows no favoritism. Acts 10:34-35 declares “Then Peter began to speak: "I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts men from every nation who fear him and do what is right.” When you commit the ungodly act of prejudice, you bring consequences upon yourself.

We are told the rebellion of Aaron and Miriam is one example for us on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come. Prejudice brings God's judgment. Numbers 12:4-5 says, “At once the LORD said to Moses, Aaron and Miriam, 'Come out to the Tent of Meeting, all three of you.' So the three of them came out. Then the LORD came down in a pillar of cloud; he stood at the entrance to the Tent and summoned Aaron and Miriam.” Remember when you were called before your parents as a child because they found out about something you did? Remember the fear? Imagine standing before an angry God.

Prejudice will still bring God's judgment today. James 2:8-9 “If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, 'Love your neighbor as yourself,' you are doing right. But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers.” If you show favoritism, you will stand before God and be convicted.

God took this sin personally. When they attacked Moses out of prejudice they attacked a man faithful in all God's house. They attacked God's spokesman. They attacked God's word. Numbers 12:6-8 says, "Listen to my words: "When a prophet of the LORD is among you, I reveal myself to him in visions, I speak to him in dreams. But this is not true of my servant Moses; he is faithful in all my house. With him I speak face to face, clearly and not in riddles; he sees the form of the LORD. Why then were you not afraid to speak against my servant Moses?" Basically God says, "How dare you!"

When we reject God's spokesman due to our own ideas, prejudices, and philosophies, we reject God. Jesus said to his disciples in Luke 10:16 "He who listens to you listens to me; he who rejects you rejects me; but he who rejects me rejects him who sent me." To reject the apostle’s doctrine because you are prejudice against his chosen messenger is to reject Him. 1 Thessalonians 4:8 says, “Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.” You are rejecting the Holy Spirit when you ignore the teaching of His Word via his messengers. How many people have not listened to God's Word due to prejudices against the speakers or some other foolish opinion based reason.

Not only will it bring judgment and rejection of God's word, prejudice rebellion brings an end to fellowship with God and his people. Numbers 12:9-12 says, “The anger of the LORD burned against them, and he left them. When the cloud lifted from above the Tent, there stood Miriam— leprous, like snow. Aaron turned toward her and saw that she had leprosy; and he said to Moses, "'Please, my lord, do not hold against us the sin we have so foolishly committed. Do not let her be like a stillborn infant coming from its mother’s womb with its flesh half eaten away.” Notice that because she wouldn't accept God’s spokesman nor Moses’ black wife, God wouldn't accept her. He left her.

When the early Christians showed prejudice, it hurt their fellowship. Galatians 2:11-14 says, “When Peter came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he was clearly in the wrong. Before certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles. But when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group. The other Jews joined him in his hypocrisy, so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray. When I saw that they were not acting in line with the truth of the gospel, I said to Peter in front of them all, "You are a Jew, yet you live like a Gentile and not like a Jew. How is it, then, that you force Gentiles to follow Jewish customs?” Many follow the crowd under the peer pressure of prejudice into sinful rebellion against God.

But rebellious prejudice not only stops fellowship, it hinders progress. Numbers 12:13-16 says, “So Moses cried out to the LORD, 'O God, please heal her!' The LORD replied to Moses, 'If her father had spit in her face, would she not have been in disgrace for seven days? Confine her outside the camp for seven days; after that she can be brought back.' So Miriam was confined outside the camp for seven days, and the people did not move on till she was brought back. After that, the people left Hazeroth and encamped in the Desert of Paran.” How many times were people saved because Moses prayed for them? Notice: Miriam didn't like the black skinned woman so God gave Miriam skin as white as snow with leprosy. It's as if God had said, "Oh, you don't like black skin? Ok! You like white skin? Ok. I will give you very white skin!"

She had to wait 7 days before she could come back in. It's like God gave her a "time out." It held everyone up. How often is a church held up by one person’s rebellion? And how often is the cause prejudice against someone else?

It happened in the early church. Acts 6:1 says, “In those days when the number of disciples was increasing, the Grecian Jews among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food.” Their rapid growth came to a screeching halt because, as so often is the case, as the church grew to include different kinds of people, they began to fight with each other. Their prejudice against Grecian-Jews was exposed. But the Apostles quickly delegated power to those who were Grecian with Grecian names to make sure there was equality in the benevolence ministry.

After the prejudice problem was dealt with Acts 6:7 says, “So the word of God spread. The number of disciples in Jerusalem increased rapidly, and a large number of priests became obedient to the faith.” They were headed for rebellion and division in the church, but when the prejudice was dealt with, the harmony allowed them all to move forward in evangelism again.

Are you rebelling against one of God's leaders because of your prejudice against another culture, race, or person? Are you destroying the fellowship and hindering progress by showing favoritism? Such things are rebellion and will bring the judgment of God.

A prayer for you guys

Remember the Lord
By Reverend Sharon Ripley

“…Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord who is great and awesome, and fight for your kin, your sons, your daughters, your wives and your bones.” Nehemiah 4:14

LORD, help us to be prayer warriors, women and men willing to pray without ceasing. You know all our fears and anxieties. Help us to banish anxiety from our hearts. We are weak but You are strong. Help us to remember that You will never fail us nor forsake us.

LORD, help us to remember that in times of distress. You are always with us. When the “unexpected storms” of life arise, help us not to panic. Calm our nerves, align our thoughts with Your Word and empower us to fight the perseverance. Deepen our faith walk and remind us never to walk by sight. Keep us from deception, discouragement and depression.

LORD, teach us to rely on You and not ourselves. Help us to remember that our strength is only in You. Show us how to be prayer warriors for our families. Strengthen us in battle, help us to stand on Your Word as we battle against the enemy and give us courage never to give up.

LORD, direct our steps in Your Word. Give us the boldness not to step back in fear when the enemy attacks us with adversity and discouragement. Ready our hands for war to take back all that the enemy has taken from us. Grant us the grace to stand in faith, knowing that our prayers protect our loved ones against every scheme of the adversary. Help us to remember that You are able to meet every need.

LORD, teach us to pray with power, persistence and courage. Help us to stand on Your promises. Grant us the faith to know that You will fulfill every one of Your promises. Help us to remember that You are always faithful to Your Word.

LORD, fill us with Your power, anoint us with Your Spirit and empower us to be women and men of faith, commitment and prayer. By Your grace and in the name and authority of Jesus Christ, let our prayers demolish every stronghold, every pretension or argument that raises itself against the knowledge of the Most High God. Anoint us with the spirit of understanding, the spirit of knowledge and the spirit of revelation. Help us to remember that You have never lost a battle.

LORD, we surrender our minds, desires and emotions to you.

We pray that you will help us to remember the power of our words and the might of Your Word. This we pray in Jesus’ name. Amen

Response to Rich (part 2)

I get the impression that you don't agree with the death penalty. Do
the surveys. While it may not serve as a deterrent to crime in one
sense,who knows how many are deterred? The numbers can be manipulated
to serve any number of agenda. Anyway, are you also saying that the
old testament speaking about punishing the offender with death is also
superseded by the law of grace? tell me what you think, then tell me
which verse says that ALL the old testament is nullified by grace.
waiting on your reply. Plus you were missing the point. God says obey the laws of the land. In Jamaica, we have the death penalty. So we are allowed to exercise it. Just so you know. I love you, keep the comments coming.

Response to Richard

1. fundamentalist is the strict bible teaching. the fundamentals. there is no right or left. that's my opinion & i m sticking to it.i m not american so forgive the difference in vocabulary.
2. i generalize when there is an overwhelming amount of evidence to indicate a type of rule. examples include but are not limited to Anglicans saying that homosexuality is not a sin, TBN evangelists saying that once u r living right, u MUST get rich as long as u pay your tithes, American evangelists who won't preach the gospel unless you pay for their fuel to power their private jet to your island, Pat saying that Chavez should be assassinated and many more i won't go into. These things cause me to believe that Christianity is now more a business or vocation in America than it is a calling to SERVE God. Richard, no disrespect and we are free to disagree but your country is the one with the plank. schoolgirls having sex in schoolbuses don't exist in your country because of the plethora of alternative places to have sex. our island is smaller than new york city! so don't speak about beam & speck. i am caustic yes. speak to me on that but don't indicate that i m unfairly bashing your country. i am not like that sir. just so you know. i love you very much. keep the comments flowing.

Pertinent piece fomr the Scripturist (www.scripturist.com)

Remember when the storm came along and scared the snot out of the apostles (Mark 4:35-41) even though they were experienced sailors? Remember how Jesus was just sleeping through it like it was nothing? Why were they freaked out and Jesus could close his eyes and sleep with his head on a pillow?

Perhaps it was because Jesus had already spent time in prayer. Mark 1:35 says, "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed." And the morning was not the only time Jesus prayed. He prayed in the evening. Matthew 14:23 "After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone." And He prayed all night sometimes. Luke 6:12 says, "One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God." Maybe if we prayed like Jesus we would have the faith to trust in God more.

Perhaps it was because Jesus was going to church each week to read God's word. Luke 4:16 says "He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom." Perhaps if we were regularly spending time in worship and the study of God's word like Jesus did we wouldn't be so faithless in the face of fear. Romans 10:17 says, "Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ." What messages have you been listening to?

Jesus was constently encouraging the disciples to remember all the amazing things he did in the past to they can trust him in the future. In Matthew 16:9 Jesus says, "Do you still not understand? Don't you remember the five loaves for the five thousand, and how many basketfuls you gathered?" They didn't believe nor understand because they were not remembering all he had done in the past. In Mark 8:18 Jesus rebukes their fear of not having food by saying, "Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear? And don't you remember?" Jesus wants us to remember. That is why he created the greatest memorial of all time. In Luke 22:19 it says, "And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me." We should take time regularly to meditate on all that God has done for us so we can remember to trust him for our future. We should be around the Lord's table each Sunday taking the bread and juice in remembrance of him. Perhaps if we obeyed this, we would trust him more.

We all face many dangers each day. We are constantly tempted. Ephesians 6:12 says, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." We are surrounded by a heavenly realm of dark spiritual forces and powers. We are swimming with sharks. "Therefore put on the full armor of God" Paul says in Ephesians 6:13, "so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand."

When a person walks by faith in the Word of God which they constantly read, rests in the peace of a relationship they experience regularly in prayer, and remember all God has done in the past, they can rest through the storms of life rather than freak out.

Student Rankings as at August 23, 2005

1. Janeze Murray (94)
   
2. Ronica Jacobs (86)
   
3. Tanesha Hall (83)
   
4. Adrian Bailey (31)
   
5. Kimberly Broomfield (18)
   
6. Brian Newman (4)
   
7. Maurice Palmer (1)
   
8. Asharee Honeywell (0)
   
9. Latoya Newell (-13)
   
10. Troy Martin (-18)
    
11. Jerdine Gilchrist (-18)
    
12. Kerron Prendergast (-18)
    
13. Akeame Spence (-33)

Merit levels are in brackets. Guys, feel free to query your score. If you are correct, I will amend this post. Later.

Policemen & Taximen

Sometimes I think these 2 groups are married. Always in some argument or tangle. Names usually mentioned in the same breath as the other. Why? I know taxi drivers are an indisciplined, ignorant lot who make their own traffic rules ( & enforce them!) but why the almost singleminded focus on them? How come we don't see the police pressuring the murderers with the same zeal? Or the reckless drivers of SUV's? This is an obvious double-standard & brings to mind the saying" duppy know who to frighten". I hate it. I remember the anecdote where police saw a taxi violating a traffic law & 2 men stabbing another man. They chose to arrest the taxi man. Now tell me, which one was more deserving of an immediate response? Sometimes I wonder about the police. Sometimes I don't need to wonder about the police. I m almost sorry for the taximen though. Dangerous job with everything hitting you on all sides. Police, fuel, killers, vehicle maintenance, etc. Plus the alleged racket where the police trumps up charges, seizes the vehicle & forces you to bribe him before he releases it or waste couple days paying fines you didn't deserve to get. It must hurt. Hope this thing gets resolved soon. Oh well. Later.

Bus fare increase

I think it's justified. JUTC needs the money but honestly though, I think they have too many routes. This translates to too many busses running at once with it's consequent costs. Why don't they cut some routes, let the route taxis take care of those & concentrate on the profitable ones. It's a company not a charity. Focus on profits. If you say it's for the public and you can't run it like that, then subsidize it & stop complaining about the financial bleeding! You can't have it both ways in this life, inefficiency does not improve profits (unless you are a monopoly with governmental connections!) so I hope the bureaucrats get some common sense soon. Plus you would have the added benefit of giving the taximen a source of revenue where they won't clash with the buses & thus siphon off revenue from JUTC. I think this is the way to go but the government, I fear, doesn't like solutions. Guess it's too easy. Will keep my ears open on this one. Won't be going away anytime soon, I fear. Later.

Dunn's River Trip

Went to Dunn's River with Nicole, Tan & Jerdine. Was fun actually. Carried Nicole's bro & Dale as company also. Janeze invited us. Told us a time but failed to meet it. Then she got upset because I said I didn't want to be late. Not a nice start to the day ( I missed communion for this?) Nevertheless, we reached. Interesting drive. Haven't been there in 2 years or so therefore it was like a new trip. When the girls changed, I almost died with laughter though as Tan had on a pants (to go in the water!) & Jerdine had on a kevlar/steel looking (looked like the one that Russell Crowe wore in Gladiator!) skirt to go in the water. Don't get me wrong, I am all for modesty in dress but this was a bit TOO modest. They could've drowned in that sort of clothing! Anyway, they were finally convinced to jettison the outer garments and were finally able to wear their REAL bathing suits. Saw PETA-gaye there. Took couple pics. Janeze was busy with family so rarely saw her. The girls lived in the water. I was not into it. Water too cold. Fun & frolic was had by all. As expected, guys were interested in tan & jer but they were not encouraged. Neff said. Enjoyed the drive back. Spent some time with Nicole afterward. Lots more happened but too lazy to type it. Another time, perhaps. Later.

Deneisha's farewell poem

O Den, my Den, lovely Den,
When will I see you again?
With those cute teeth like a bunny,
Know you didn't find that funny,
Wonderful eyes brimming with joy,
That caught the attention of many a boy,
Loved your company so much,
When I was down, I appreciated your tender touch,
Nobody else will ever be like you,
I really appreciated the things you said, wrote & still do,
Den-Den, I miss you dear,
Can't wait till you return here,
May God keep you in His arms,
Safely away from satan's deadly charms,
So that when next we meet,
After we run to each other with happy feet,
We will both be able to say,
Jesus is still the ONLY way,
God bless you wherever you are,
As I will always have you as a favourite star.

I love you Deneisha. Miss you badly.

Den is gone

One of my favourite girls is gone now. She emigrated last month to many people's regret. I will miss her very much. Her smile, her cute little bunny teeth, her sweet personality, her charming ways, even her constant talking. I loved them all. Won't be another like her but I hope that she will be ok where she's living. Hope especially that she stays Christian as it's very difficult being a fundamentalist Christian in the USA. So much compromising/questioning of the Bible. Hope she sticks it through. God bless you Deneisha.

Youth/MOV Week

This was a surprise. It was actually very good. the preaching was superb, the lineup was not cluttered with unnecessary "performances" & God was there. only minor problems existed (on the MOV side) butt hat will be changed next year. I was blown away by the words of the preacher. Donald Grant, you just gained an intercessor (part-time). I loved his delivery. clear, no gimmicks (much) and straight. that's how i like it. no diluting of the word. i want to be offended. that's when i know my flesh is being attacked. go rev! one of those rare things at church that is worth my fuel to experience. hope next year will improve on this ( bible passage readers desperately needed!). Later.

VBS

I think VBS can be such a waste of time. It's not being fully supported anymore. Went there this year. Hardly any teachers, the teaching material didn't seem to hold the interest of the students ( who seemed only to come because their parents sent them). Is this supposed to be an educational experience or a 1 week daycare facility? The lady in charge was given a small basket to carry water & I am glad as it showed that God is in control. He stepped in & she got the job done. I think my church needs to either take the thing seriously or scrap it. Half done things are an insult to the church & by extension, God. Just my opinion. Crucify if you wish. Can't stop my thoughts.

What about victims' rights?

Why do the human rights people ALWAYS seem to care about the killers' right to life? Is it that their victims have a right to death? Honestly, you can't even execute a criminal in peace anymore! Now you may say that I can say anything because I am not on death row but as a Christian, I am not afraid of death anymore & God is in control of EVERYTHING that happens to me so I honestly wouldn't worry. Speaking for myself though. Anyway, they complain about trials, killers waiting too long on death row & how cruel it is. They don't remember the families crushed by their loved one ( & breadwinner) being violently taken away from them. They don't remember when the perpetrator acts unrepentant when found guilty. They don't remember that even the lawyers KNOW they are guilty but the cheque keeps them quiet. I just hate hypocrisy. If u are talking about human rights, deal with ALL human rights. Don't give me selective justice. You are playing a dangerous game. One day, the killers will be at your door. What will you say when they rape, sodomize & murder your 7 year old child? I get the funny feeling your views will change then. Later.

Christian Friends

I believe as Christians that we should seek to have as our CLOSEST friends Christian people. Now don't get me wrong, I did NOT say no unsaved should be a friend.Just said your closest friends should share your beliefs & value system. Otherwise you will be torn in a lot of different places in your life. Make no mistake, peer pressure is POWERFUL. God called us to be family. Although too many Christians are ( to put it mildly) screwed-up, gossiping, judgmental backstabbers, I think we should make a special effort to seek out Christians & trust God to help us in our decision making & friendship forming. Try it, guys. All the best. God is with us & will give you wisdom if you ask Him in faith. later.

Thanks James.

Got this comment. Got me thinking. Really appreciate the constructive (positive & negative) comments I get. Keep them coming. I really appreciate his one. Thanks again, James.



Howdy, bro; took me over an hour to finish reading your many entries but I want to tell you I enjoyed reading so much more than I did last time. I liked seeing your kids and their beautiful smiles, the car show, the many quotations from various sources, and your sex wars piece / men & women, was priceless. **re June 14 blog, on your '99 checklist, were these notes on slowing Christians down not originally from C.S. Lewis' The Wormwood stories? I believe so . You have many insights that God does not share with everyone; your heart is very much fertile, rich soil for the Holy Spirit, The Father takes much pleasure in hearts like yours. May I share something with you re. serving God? I learned many years ago that there are times when we recognize an area of our lives where we are weak and are undoubtedly failing God; we might agonize over our flesh and even be unwilling to surrender some fleshly possession or habit. But if we do recognize the fault, we can still pray "Lord, help me to be willing; I will to be willing". This is no mighty revelation, and is no instant cure for any mortal weakness, but it is effective....if we let it. The Lord bless you, brother. P.S.- marriage has its trials, unlike anything in single life, and is not a cure for the itches the single person feels. Loneliness, I have found, can be far greater when you have a mate (and imperfect times in your relationship) than when you are single. BUT...if you desire the wonderful pleasures of femalecompanionship...and love being tried & tested to bring about greater maturity in Christ....marriage can be sweet. So, do not move in FEAR, move in love. James 'aka Templar' Pettitt

JEP

Another from Theology Web ( I loved this one)

Things women think men don't know about women

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Quote:

1. i wish men realized that there is a difference between being irrational and being emotional.

Umm.... Being emotional isn't generally rational... so....

Quote:

2. i wish men realized that we don't always want them to figure things out for us. sometimes we just want them to be around as we figure it out.

Sorry, that's how we're built. You have to tell us when you don't want us to fix it.

Quote:

3. i wish men realized that sometimes we really do get upset, and it's not always pms.

And sometimes you're manipulating us by being upset, too, but it's hard to tell the difference between the three.

Quote:

4. i wish men realized that not every woman lives to shave her legs every day.

Hey, if you want to look hairy next to your girlfriends, go for it.



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Quote:

-just b/c i have blonde hair doesn't mean i'm stupid...i might be smarter than you think

Then don't use being blonde to make us think you're stupid.

Quote:

-don't patronize me b/c i have ways of getting back at you

Suuuuure you do.


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Quote:

Gender communication research shows that men tend to interrupt women more than they interrupt men, or than women interrupt either men or women. This has always bugged me, b/c it seems Christian men are just as bad as all the rest in this dept.

Men want to think in straight lines. When you deviate from a straight line (or jump from topic to topic), a man will generally want to talk to the point he thinks you just finished, so he'll interrupt you. Men talk in straight lines, so we tend to listen longer.

Quote:

My husband is extraordinarily and consistently kind, loving, generous and attentive. However, when we are in public or visiting friends and family he tends to interrupt me. He will sometimes ignore or misinterpret verbal/body language cues from others too. The only arguments we have ever had resulted from this annoying habit. I know he tries and it's better now, but it still bothers me on occasion.

Remember that men are not NEARLY as in tune with relational things such as body language and such as you are. That's just us.

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Quote:

That foreplay for a friday night jaunt starts monday morning. ;)

Yeah, well... We aren't usually thinking that far ahead. WE only need a few moments notice.

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That we aren't idiots at the auto repair shop

Then don't fall for it.


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That I'm not impressed when they tell me they can outdrink all their friends.

Yeah, well, that's what we use to impress other guys.


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Other unimpressive feats:
Burping,
competitive body noises,
arm wrestling,
best DnD character,
best golf score,
competitive facial hair growth,
most gruesome wound,
grossest pet,
stupidest thing done in college,
stupidest thing done yesterday,
navigational skills that involve four hours to go thirty miles,
and the least impressive of all:
how many other girls you've dated - even less impressive if all at once.

Again, it impresses all our OTHER friends.


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That would require that they actually try to understand us - rather than assuming women are men in nicer packages.

Oh, believe me, we know better than THAT.

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Could be worse - they could give up altogether - let's face it, we only care what they think because we like them, too...

Exactly. Maybe you women could figure out that WE aren't women in rougher packaging.

Quote:

At least until they annoy us!

The feeling is mutual.

Quote:

In the meantime, ya find a good one, love him the best you can, and hope he figures out that toilet seat thing before you go into the nursing home....

The toilet seat gets less wear and tear if you leave it in the position it was in when the toilet was last used. Are you incapable of looking where you're sitting before you sit?

(Staying late at work practical jokes: Go to all the ladies' rooms and put all the toilet seats up... )


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Quote:

I wish men would realize it's okay to stop and ask for directions!

No, it's NOT! This shows that you don't know MEN.

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hey sister...did you get lost on the way to Oki and rodger wouldn't stop and ask directions?

Remember that whole "Not talking in a straight line" thing...


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I find it extremely annoying when a guy assumes that I need him to take care of me. For example, one time I went out with this guy and his friends and we were all at a bar that was known for having some "rough" characters. Before we entered Mike (the guy I was with) told me that if anyone started messing with me...to tell him or one of his friends.
I kept thinking....dude, I'm 5'2" but if it came to it...I can hold my own!
It's nice that guys want to protect us....it really is. But I hate it when they think we can't protect ourselves at all and need them like a bodyguard.

What? Telling you that they're there for you says that they think you can't take care of yourself? Well, I guess we can toss all the chivary stuff, then, right? Or are you saying that you're just a man in a nicer package?


(Yes, I know you can't answer these. Thought the guys might want to comment on these, or mention a few things that men wish women knew about men....)

Michael

Reprinted from TheologyWeb for you guys to read ( www.theologyweb.com)

I'm a single guy nearly 25. I don't go to singles bars or places like that. I stick with meeting women at work and church and places where you don't go to specifically "pick up women."

Anyhow, I've read enough about what women are complaining about. Let me say some stuff and see if any single guys relate or married guys remember. A lot of this could mirror what MuzicMan said as well.

First off, we can understand mathematical theories and philosophical ideas and scientific discoveries, but we CANNOT understand body language. I cannot understand if you are flirting with me or being friendly. Maybe you can understand us, but we can't understand you.

Second, we need some real clue you're interested. Many of us won't ask unless we think there's some slight chance you might actually say yes. When we play games, we play because we want to win. When we ask a girl out, it's because we think they'll say yes.

Thirdy, I want to be clear that we will think about sex, but that is not all we think about. Some of us do think about being nice guys and sometimes if we think about sex, we think about your pleasure and bringing you pleasure more than us.

Fourthly, Even if we date, just because we do not spend every second with you does not mean that we do not care about you. We need time alone with our friends to do totally guy stuff just like you need time with other females to do female stuff.

Fifthly, please don't give us that talk about saying "I just want a nice guy who will care about my feelings." I've seen enough girls that say that and simply instead date the next guy that comes along who physically reminds them of Brad Pitt. Say it if you mean it and then act accordingly. I'd prefer if you even just said "I want a guy with some muscles" just to be honest.

Sixthly, those of us that are Christians, be supportive around us. We are going to be tempted many times. Just because a guy loves JEsus Christ does not mean that he loses his hormones. We want to wait also. Remember grace and remind us of our Lord if we really get tempted.

Seventhly, we want marriage material also. It's more than having an awesome figure or being a toothpick. It's seeing if you have good qualities that are supportive in a marriage relationship and if you'll be a good mother.

Well that's some more of my ranting. If anyone has anything to add, feel free to do so.

Tanesha at VBS

Them again

My girls at the party

Ash at Dale's party

Scene from party

Scene from party

Scene from Dale's party

This is my new friend. Ash. Great christian lady. Hope she continues growing in God.

Participating in Church

I see so many children participating in church when they're young, then as they get older, they slack off. Don't the adults see that children can go through the motions just as well ( if not better) as they can? Or do they really think that these children are doing it out of love. I believe that the vast majority of children active in church do so under STRONG parental pressure. That's why the minute they are free to choose their destiny, they reject church as they were turned off by this. Just my opinion. Noticed how children of pastors have a reputation for being bad? Also children of other church leaders? Ever think why? I personally believe that most church leaders present a front to us in church while their home life stinks. My opinion. Why? I look at their children. If they can't control their kids, who they have control over, how can they lead me? Stop condemning others if your child is just as bad. Fix the beam before the speck. I hope that the parents will wise up soon, start modeling God before their children so they will fall in love God and serve in church permanently. Just a dream?