Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Got this from a friend ( hop you guys appreciate these hints.)

The following rules are intended as a helpful guide for ladies uncertain of what is the proper procedure and behaviour. The following are a few of the main do and donts but individual situations may vary. For example situations of a one night stand, coveting your breddrins girl/sister or in cases of extreme blue ba%%s Worried you may find youself above these rules due to your positions of power over us men at that moment of time.

Applicable to wifeys and sistrens and ahem ahem "friends":

- Do always dress appropriately before entering the car... no hair nets, curlers or shower caps Refuse ( I cannot stress this one enough)

- Do not invite some of your friends for a ride unless they look as good as you or are at the very least are easy.

- Do not under any circumstance change the radio station unless (pay attention now) you ask permission first, have just/or are imminently about to give up some, are a wifey and have earned the right to change the station without warning or know driver long enough as a sistren to know he would like the station changed

- Do not tell me how to drive and dont tell me to change the car

- Do offer to feed fries or other finger food to the driver while driving if you have wifey status

- If you look good and have sistrin status or even acquaintance status do expect to be posed off with. You and the driver know nothing is going on but other drivers don't know that and the driver may like to keep it that way. So do not move away if driver slides towards the centre of the car in classic hubby position. You will receive many points and assure yourself of many future rides if you allow him this small ego boost.

- If you have long hair do toss it from side to side on occasion.

- Do not wear a baseball cap unless you look damn good in it, driver likes the sporty look or your hair looks like @!@#

- If you have wifey status then give driver at least one "oh honey you kicked his ass" for every 5 "okay that's enough now.. slow down.. I'm serious"

- Do not adjust drivers reverse mirror or side mirror unless you are teasing said driver with some tongue play (driver's eyes must be visible to you in mirror if you pull this move)

- Know that mini skirts are more appropriate front seat attire than pants or a long dress.

- Do wear a sexy or sweet smelling perfume or body splash if you are going to insist on being drive with A/C

- Do realize that Front seat appearance is a privilege.... NOT A RIGHT and you privilege may be suspended without notice (especially in cases of those with non wifey status) for example for mothers, long lost breddrins or business situations. When faced with one of these situations remove yourself from the front seat and jump into the back on said persons approach and like it.
(NB) there is an exception to this rule. If you are not/or not yet wifey you will gain many points by going into the back before being asked and saying "it's cool you stay in the front" when offered the front seat back by driver or passenger. HOWEVER IF and only IF you are looking hot, very hot that day and driver wishes your presence beside him then if driver insists more than twice that you stay in front then you should do so. You can feel good.. very good. You are on your way up.

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